Dear Uncle TM,
I have always wanted to get some kind of college degree but I haven’t had the time or money to go through the process. Now since my invention of a unique devise to locate frogs in heavily wooded areas (Fred’s Frog Finder) I have the money to pursue a degree but I am still lacking in time. Uncle TM I don’t want to resort to some cheap paper mill school to get a degree but I have run out of options. Do you have any suggestions?
Signed,
Fred the Frog Finder
Dear Fred,
Obviously you are a man of refined action and I can tell by your letter that you are qualified to enter into Uncle TM’s doctorate program that has been formulated with the cooperation of Universidad de Andorra. Since the program is totally flexible and driven by monetary considerations, you will never claim that your degree was in any way cheap. In fact it has been said that the mere cost of the program gives it credibility. As a bonus feature you can add additional amounts of laude for additional consideration. The degree automatically comes with a magna cum laude designation but maxima and summa are available. Will you be paying by check or credit card? Also, let us know how to correctly spell your name. As a matter of school policy, all degrees are non-returnable.
When it seems that your life is without hope and direction, you need to either write to Uncle TM for comprehensive and compassionate advice at TMSharp@gmail.com or check out his book, “Uncle TM’s Advice to the Forlorn and Desperate”. Light and humorous, the book will show you that when compared to others, your problems are few! Go to www.uncletm.com
